Ang Huling Hiling

It’s been a while, and yes. I could really tell that a LOT of things happened. Pero I don’t really wanna open it up to anyone. I always have this attitude of keeping things to my self and handling it alone. We’ll yea that’s just me. Anyway. Here’s a clue of whats going on around me lately. I’ve been trying and trying. pero yea. Minsan narerealize ko nalang.. Sa larawan nalang..  

Here’s Larawan by Eevee :) [ http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kji3CmJ_TZY ]

Read it well….

Pwede ba kitang
Makunan ng larawan
Kahit isa lang
Para merong ala-ala
Ang ating nakaraan

Ngunit mayroon kang
Ibang minamahal
Kung kaya’t ako’y
‘Di mo pinapansin

Sa larawan nalang
Kita mahahagkan
Sa larawan nalang

Tayo magpakasal
Sa larawan nalang

Baka pwedeng legal
Dahil dito sa mundo
Bawal.

Paano ba kita makakalimutan

Kay rami na kasi
Ang pinagdaanan
Ipagpatawad mo

Kung mahal pa rin kita
Ipagpatawad mo
Kung mahal pa rin kita.

Mahal kita, alam mo yan. Puso at isipan. Malayo man ako sa iyo. At may roong iba jan sa puso mo. Alam mo. na ikaw lang. at ikaw pa rin ang taong mamahalin ko. 

Diba?

2:01AM - 6/2/2011

It’s been quite a day today. Dami nangyari na hindi inaasahan, Madaming bagay na sumagi at pumasok sa utak ko pero in the end. These lines from a song I wrote still won as my resolve. “Di ako susuko sayo, Di ko Iiwanan Ito. Sana’y pakinggan mo” Anyway, jan nalang yung clue kung bakit yan yung pinili ko i feat. Soo, ayun. Just got home like half an hour ago, galing kasi ako ng taft with boky. “Happy Birthday!!” Ayun, before going home I talked to someone para nman medyo mabawasan ung bigat na dinadala ko. “Thank you yie! :)” Well, to be honest. I’m not okay. As in. HINDI TALAGA. I actually don’t know what to feel anymore. I mean, after everything na nangyre today, yesterday. Parang gumuho yung mundo ko?. Ganun yung feeling. Hindi ma explain and I really hate the feeling. Pero yea, I have to accept the fact na It’s reality. I have to face it maturely. Not some 6yr. old kid crying my way out of the problem. Yes, I’m hurt. Sobrang hurt. Pero sabi nga ng kaibigan kong malupet “Den, It’s either stop, or mag pakamartry ka. Your choice bro” Well, matigas ang ulo ko. so basically.. ALAM NA. :| Anyway, saka na muna yan. I really hope she’s okay. I’m not mad at her or anything. Atleast she was honest about it. Cguro masakit lang talaga. Kasi nga, yun nga. Complications started to f*ck up everything in the end. Pero this doesnt mean na I’ll just stop and give up. Well, I WONT. Cguro I’ll rest. But my heart remains the same. :) And I hope hindi ako mag sisi sa mga nagiging desisyon ko.

So  today was like super damn tiring and all. Didn’t go to class kasi sobrang nakkawalang gana. Didn’t eat anything the whole day (Except candies) Slamat nalang nung gabi eh kasi nkapag hapunan ako dun sa friend ko. TY. :) Bok would be leaving for palawan tomorrow. Birthday getaway nya. Inggit me. So basically ako maiiwan mag isa sa bahay/taft and whatever. Nakooooooooo. ayon. Will try to meetup with a friend tomorrow. Sana matuloy. I really need her damn “HOMILY” (Malupet kasi magalet yun eh.) na ibibigay nya sakin bukas. So yea, cguro till here nalang. Nagising si mama, matulog na daw ako. Yea I guess I have to rest na din. So some other time nalang cguro.. Labo ko..

I’m not mad at you, not even a bit. I’m not gonna halt this feeling. not even thinking about it. I just wanted to prove you how much you mean to me. And I’m ready to face all the consequences of my actions. Just for ya. Okay? I miss you, Wish we could talk soon.

Ciao~ (The words in the picture was a line from one of my original songs)

“A touch of Christ.”

This photo was taken last month i guess by ME!! :D Hahaha hello amateur wanna photographer. :)) Was just trying out Pao’s Canon EOS 60D. Sa may pacita laguna. :) so ayun. Today was like.. Uhh.. Boring. AS IN!! Actually I just got home from taft to get some things, then balik na ulit. money din. hahaha. :)) Medyo grounded ako pagdating sa allowance ko kasi sobrang nag titipid si mama about something big. :| (bket kelangan damay ako eh noh?:) ) anyway, I’m missing someone, yea.. SWEARRR.. sobrang wala lang, prang after quite some time now. hindi na kme ganun mag usap, mag kita and whatever.. pero yea.. I guess ganito talaga? kasi nga.. basta ewan, dami complications. :| And yes. I’m hell worried. to myself, to her. pero yun nga. I have to accept whatever it is na mangyari. Specially kung magiging decision nya. Ayunn.. I hope I could meet her up tonight, tagal nga ni mama eh gusto ko na umalis. :) I wish I wish.. lalng, The feeling of not seeing her makes me feel…. Incomplete. :( pero yea other than thattt… I saved someone. as in, I know it was my fault. pero I saved this friend of mine kasi its my responsibility. Diba diba?? basta yun. Sunday I’d be having a reunion again with my Highschool teammates. :) We’re gonna play at the Monfort Cup? (pagkarinig ko..) in Ateneo de Manila University football field. :) So ayun, wish us luck.. wala na sa kundisyon to brad. haha. :) Siguro till here nalang muna… God! please help me.. Help me to be strong in everything. Give me the strength to hold on and never give up on this very very special person. I’ve decided to wait. and yea, kahit alam ko malaki yung risk of me getting hurt. I just don’t care anymore. Kasi I know that it’s really damn worth it. :) Give my old man (Dad) a safe trip home this coming june okay?. I miss my old man… Till here.. Ciao~

I MISS YOU MUCH, ALL I CAN DO NOW IS LOOK AT YOUR PICTURE. :(

Women are treated with utmost love and respect. Simply because they DESERVE IT.

A perfect moment captured and frozen in time. <3

Yes, It’s her baby pictureee. Cute noh? She told me she was playing the organ when she was little. AWWWW >:D< So yea, and sakto I was asking for a baby picture from her (BABY BA TO!? MATANDA NA TO EH.. JOKE!) Pero yea. Atleast meron ako. And there was a letter behind that picture too. :) Shoot it using my sister’s SLR so yea, edit edit.. kasi.. basta. :)) So yea going baackkk

Today was really. Hmm.. Okay? Haha. Thanks to that last minute letter na I read a few minutes ago. :) It really really made me smile. :) As in. :) Hihi. <3. So yea. Today was a lot. YES. A LOT! Kasi there were a lot of things on my mind lately. Thinking about so much stuff na It kinda stressed me out. But yea, I’m fine naman. :) Class was great, petix na seryoso. (HUH!? LABO) :)) Pero yea, carry naman. I saw her today. Pero super saglet lang. I handed over the book na I promised to lend her and for her friend. tpos yun. Mga 10 seconds lang siguro kme nagkita. She got the book, said good bye, walked away. :| Then I was like staring at her while she walks away from me. (ANG COLD) Pero yea, there were some things kasi na It troubled us eh, basta. Something happened last night and ayun, we had a few talks din. Sooooooooo yea.. Hmm spend the whole afternoon at my brother’s condo unit. (BOKY. ;)) Food trip/Tambay/Tulog as usual. Then called someone kasi I really really felt so sad kanina. Haha. Thank you. :) Pero ayun nga. Was okay naman. Before going home dumaan ako ng sherwood to greet my boy Mike. kasi It was his birthday and ayun. nakita ko na naman si ate Joy. :) (Owner ng Deer Hunter) Pinakilala nya sken si Ate Kat, new partner thingy daw nya in business.. so ayunn. :) Di rin ako nag tagal, umalis din ako kgad. Then SOBRANG TRAFFIC!!! Grabe! Swear, kahit san ka dumaan kanina napaka ubod ng traffic.. Pagdating ko sa bahay 200 yung cab fare ko and I was like WTF… :| Pero okay lang. Nde nman ako na hassle sa pag uwi. :))

So yea, I would like to thank you. IKAW.. OO IKAW. Haha. Uhm.. L***** <3. Thank you sa letter mo, as in sobrang.. sobrang napasaya mo ako. HAHA. shet ano ba yan ang pa cute ko nman. :)) So yea we had a few talks about.. uhm. us?. I guess I have to take my friend’s advice about taking it slowly but surely. Getting there pero wag hapitin. Siguro. Sana. Maybe. Baka. Ewan. :| Pero yea. Like what i told her. I’m willing to wait. Since I really know na It’s gonna be really worth waiting for someone like her. If ikaw nasa position ko. Masasabi mo talaga. AS IN. We’ll yea. I guess I have to chillax (CHILL + RELAX = CHILLAX) :)) Kasi I’m too hot daw sbi ni brother pao. :) So yea. ayun. Ayan na bblanko na ako. I guess hanggang dito nalang muna. Ciao friends. ;)

Sometimes, You just realize that It was really worth waiting. For someone like YOU. <3

If a composer could say what he had to say in words he would not bother trying to say it in music.

- Gustav Mahler

Me and Vianca @ ESA Gig.

Photo By: John Dominguez

A friend that will never leave your side when you’re hurt.

How am I doing? To be frankly honest. I do not know. These days, I don’t have any focus to myself, school, music or whatsoever. It’s just me struggling. Trying to become happy. Looking for reasons to smile and say to myself that I’m okay. It was never easy to hide feelings. Not for me. I know deep inside me that theres a reason why these things keep on coming back to me. Should I stop? Should I just give up? We’ll, I just f*cking don’t know yet. Maybe I’m beginning to like this torture after all.

Why does this have to happen in the first place?

Holy crap, this is mom’s!? Whaaaaaaaaaaat!?

Nakakamiss din pala maging “KALBO”.. :)

The Old Rivermaya

I wanted to share a song from their album before. I hope it brings back memories to you guys. It’s IF by Rivermaya. I can really relate with the song kasi. Haha. Enjoy. ;)

IF

If i could choose to live my life
there’ll be no if’s to say
if i would choose to hold ur hand
there’ll be no words to say
without thought
without pride
leave the things that see to weaken us
without fear
without lies
let the magic turn ur life around
if i would choose to touch u there
would u touch me there too
 
if u would choose to stay with me
i’ll spend my life with u
without thought
without pride
leave the things that seem to weaken us
without fear
leave ur lies
let the magic turn ur life around

Once a believer, Always a believer.

Till next time Bamboo.

This man is KUYA JOBERT!.. :D It’s been a while since nag post ako. Anyway, sobrang wala kasi sa mood and… bsta yun na yun. Just wanna share this song written by kuya jobert. :) It’s really nice. if you guys wanna hear it, here’s a link ng performance nila nung sa Myx Mo 2010. My bassist Ron Estrella was playing bass for Kuya Jobert din. Enjoy :)

I really wanted to share this one, kasi It relates to me.. as in sobra.. haha EMOOOOOOO.. anyway here’s the link.

Link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dXZyYiyOx0g

Langit Na Rin - Kuya Jobert

1st Verse
Sa gabi’t araw, ikaw ang laging nais matanaw,
Ang iyong ganda’y naiiba’t katangitangi,
Parang anghel lalo na’t pag ika’y nakangiti

Chorus
Panalangin ko sana’y dinggin,
kahit sa panaginip lang ay marinig ko na ako’y minamahal mo rin,
wala na kong mahihiling, pagkat sa piling mo’y parang,
Langit na rin.

2nd Verse
Mula nang masilayan ka, hanggang ngayo’y di nagiiba,
pagtulog ko’y napapangarap na kasama,
kung maaari lang ayaw ko nang gumising pa,
kung ika’y mawawalay, ang mundo ko’y mawawalan ng buhay at kulay,
dahil nais ko habang buhay, kapiling kang tunay

Chorus
Panalangin ko sana’y dinggin,
kahit sa panaginip lang ay marinig ko na ako’y mahal mo rin,
wala na kong mahihiling, dahil sa piling mo’y parang,
Langit na rin.

Dahil sa piling mo’y parang,
Langit na rin.